His name is Amadou

“André is not even my name, mate, d’you know what I mean?”

You’ve probably seen the viral clip in which Amadou Onana flips from fluent French to a thick English accent to casually scold a reporter for inexplicably mixing him up with the Manchester United goalkeeper.

It personifies an adaptable and charismatic young man: he’s played for seven different clubs by the age of 22, lived in five countries already, and speaks five languages. His personality shines in every media snippet he’s involved in. He is as captivating off the pitch as he is on it.

EURO 2024 is a big tournament for Amadou. He’s been a significant part of the respectable and effective Dycheball at Everton for nearly two years - the next two weeks could help him realise grander ambitions.

Indeed, the first group game against Slovakia already stress-tested those credentials. His 70 touches is the third-most he’s had in a game all season, and the 60% share of possession Belgium were afforded is more than Everton had in all but two Premier League games. It’s a different dynamic.

I was so excited to watch him that I’ve watched the game twice — once live, once off a dodgy website (for legal reasons this is a joke - ed) — and prattled down some notes and spammed a load of screenshots along the way.

Here are my digests and dissuasions from the first half only, because otherwise I’d short the Substack servers with the amount of screenshots.

In this editorial analysis:

• Can Amadou Onana pass?
• But can Amadou Onana turn?
• All the other NBA-style stuff
• Holding, tracking, and covering